3 Step Process To Eliminate Negative Beliefs About Yourself and Accept Your True Identity

All of us at some point in our lives have been plagued by limiting beliefs about ourselves and what we can do. And that is okay. But what is not okay is to allow these limiting beliefs to stop us from reaching purpose when…

All of us at some point in our lives have been plagued by limiting beliefs about ourselves and what we can do. And that is okay. But what is not okay is to allow these limiting beliefs to stop us from reaching purpose when God has already given us the victory through his death and through the Word of God written in the Bible.

“So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed.“- St. John 8:36 (NIV)

As believers of Christ, it is very important that we accept the fact that we don’t have to live defeated, we don’t have to allow our fears and self-doubts to stop us from reaching purpose.

By studying the Word of God, I have identified 3 steps to eliminate or remove false beliefs about yourself and own who God has called you to be in the marketplace as Coaches, Consultants, and Service Providers.

  1. Recognize your limiting beliefs
  2. Reject the lies
  3. Replace lies with the truth

I call these the 3R’s To Unstoppable Confidence Method

This is what the Bible means when it says we should take every thought captive to the obedience of Christ (
2 Corinthians 10:5 NIV). It is recognizing the thoughts, reject them (or tear down every stronghold) because they don’t align with what God says about you, and then replacing and affirming the truth.

This method is a small part of what I teach my clients to do in my Rediscover Your Shine intensive.

Step 1: Recognize your limiting beliefs

The first step to changing or eliminating your negative beliefs is to first identify them. You cannot change what you are not aware of. And you cannot replace what you are afraid to confront. So to live a life of purpose by removing your limiting beliefs you first have to confront or identify them.

And sometimes this can be very difficult to do. Many years ago I had a very negative perception of myself, and because I had these negative beliefs about myself for so many years, I felt comfortable in my discomfort, it was a very hard thing to do to say ‘hey these are the lies you have been telling yourself and this is how it is stopping you from living in purpose’.

Maybe you have been telling yourself for years:

“I’m inadequate.”

“I’m unlovable.”

“I’m a loser.”

“I’m weak.”

“I’m a failure.”

“I’m not enough.

These are not your truth, these are stories you have picked up from your environment sometimes during childhood or later on in life.

These thoughts may be so automatic and ingrained, perhaps even subconscious, that we often aren’t really aware this is actually what we think about ourselves.

Two things we can do to start recognizing the lies are:

1. Look at our lives and the results we have been getting over the years and also in our business/career.

2. Become aware of what triggers you (e.g. when you are on a call with a potential customer or client and he/she is asking you how much you charge or how he/she can pay you. Do you experience anxiety, guilt or fear? This is a sign that you have a negative belief that you need to remove) and the things you say to yourself throughout the day (e.g. I am not pretty enough; this will never work; I am broke etc.). If you say these to yourself often, you have a negative belief.

or maybe you have caught yourself saying things like:

  • “I can’t write a book or start a blog. No one cares what I have to say.”
  • “I could never do what they can do. They’re just way more talented than me.”
  • “I can’t do that. I just don’t have the talent, skills, or intelligence.”
  • “I’ll never have a lot of money. I just wasn’t born into the right circumstances.”
  • “Not everyone can live their dream life. Some of us just have to settle for less.”

This is what the Bible means when it says to lay every thought captive, it is to recognize the thought and then assess it. Is this thought or belief empowering me or dis-empowering me? Will it take me closer to my dreams or away from my dreams? Is it in alignment with God’s words or out of alignment?

Reject The Lies

Now that we have recognized or uncover the belief that is keeping you stuck, or lay it captive, now we have to reject it.

Because I have become comfortable with the lies I was telling myself:

  • God cannot use me, I am too damage.
  • I will never be successful
  • No one loves me.
  • I am a big failure
  • I am not good enough and worthy of love

These were all lies I was telling myself and I had embraced these lies because at the time they seemed to be truth. I couldn’t spot the lies I was telling myself because I didn’t know who I was in Christ, and I had a lot of unresolved trauma and emotional wounds that I needed to heal from.

These were dead weights. The Bible says in Hebrews 12:1 that we should “strip off every weight that slows us down”

What are the thoughts that are weighing you down and stopping you from reaching purpose and building a successful business?

What is God saying about you? Do not accept the lies you have been telling yourself, reject them. People’s opinions, or your mistakes and failures, your social environment, your physical features, your parental background or your educational background or even the job you have doesn’t define who you are at your core.

Replace The Lies

Now that you have identified the stories or beliefs you have about yourself, you now have to reject them if you have come to the conclusion that they are no longer serving. Many of us have identified the lies but we don’t want to replace them because they have been serving in some ways. I felt comfortable with my lies because in some dysfunctional way they were serving me.

So now that you have said to yourself ‘I don’t want to believe that lie anymore’ you have to replace the lies by affirming the truth of who you really are.

One of the biggest thing why it was so hard for me to reject the lies I was telling myself, was because I didn’t know who I was without the lies. My identity was based on these lies and without them, I felt empty.

I felt empty because I didn’t know how to affirm the truth of who God says I am.

You can’t just leave a vacuum. You have to fill the hole left by the lie you booted out. (Mt 12:43-45) So you must search God’s word for truths to overcome the lies.

So take a look at the limiting beliefs you have been telling yourself, what is the opposite of each of these beliefs? Affirm them to yourself and do the opposite of what you have been doing. If you have been resisting the call to write a book because you never felt good enough, start writing that book and know that you are worthy and good enough.

If God called you into the marketplace and if he woke you up this morning, that is a sign that you are not your stories, you are who God says you are.

Here are a few truths from the Bible you can begin to accept about who you are:

  • God meets all my needs. Phil 4:19 And my God will meet all your needs according to the riches of his glory in Christ Jesus.
  • I am free from condemnation. Romans 8:1 There is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.
  • I have a future of hope. Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.
  • I am a new creation. 2 Cor 5:17 Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come. The old has gone, the new is here!
  • I am an heir of God. Romans 8:17 Now if we are children, then we are heirs—heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ if indeed we share in his sufferings in order that we may also share in his glory.

Do not accept the lies about who you are, you are worthy, good enough, love, abundant, good, and powerful.

Are you ready to finally overcome the limiting beliefs and fears that have been keeping you stuck? Then my Rediscover Your Shine 1-1 coaching program is exactly what you need to help you to do so. Learn more about the program here